Fabric Has Memory

Let’s play a little game this week.  What comes to mind when you hear this song?

Now how about this song?

Annnd finally this one?

I know I’m seriously dating my aging self.  But in my humble opinion, after 1995 there really was very little good music made.  However, I know many of my readers live in the same age brackets I do and will recognize the above music videos.  And I also realize that along with knowing these videos well (because they were played ad nauseum on the radio, MTV, and VH1), there are literally thousands of memories associated with the songs.  What came to mind as you listened to each of them?  If you’re like me, hundreds of memories come to mind.  People, places, events – they all come flooding back.

Let’s switch gears for just a hot second.  How many of you have pictures like this in your albums or tucked away in family Bibles?  How many of you inherited photos such as these – sometimes found in the pages of old books or stuffed in drawers or boxes?  Do you know these people?  Can you recall their names or where these pictures were taken?

There is a chance, if you have inherited a box or album of such photos, you may not know many of the people in them.  If you’re one of my younger readers, there’s an even better chance you don’t recognize any of the people in the pictures.* 

Now let me ask you a couple of questions.  First, if you recognize the above music videos, good for you.  But does not having all the cassette tapes or CDs or (gasp) vinyl records make the music any less meaningful to you?  If I had only played a snippet or two of the music, could you still recall how you felt when you heard the songs or how much the music moved you?  If I cut any of the above music videos down to one or two minutes would it have made it any less meaningful to you? 

Second, how attached can you be to photos of people you never met?  I am a long-time user of Ancestry.com.  I’ve been chasing my genetic roots for about seven years.  Through this process, I’ve met some DNA-linked distant cousins who have gifted me copies of photos of long-dead, equally distant aunts, uncles, and fourth great-grandparents I’ve never met.  I treasure each and every one of them.  But if pressed for space and I had to choose between these pictures and precious photos of my grand darlings?  Evangeline and Elli would win every time – hands down.  There would be no competition.  I’ve never met those far-off, long-dead relations.  I held both my granddaughters when they were just a few hours old. 

A very wise Snowman said this:

If you’ve been semi-observant so far, you’ve realized I am dealing with memory in this blog.  And while the jury is still kind of out about if water really does have memory, I am certain about this:  Fabric has memory.  It does.  I’m not referring to how sometimes we can treat fabric so it “remembers” to fold back on itself or press it so the seams “recollect” how to nest.  I’m not dealing with that kind of “memory.”  This blog deals with our memories and how they get tangled up with our stash and why this makes it difficult to sometimes purge like we need to.  And all of this has to do with the place where I am in my own life and in my own studio.  Bill and I are at the point in our home where we need to decide whether to “love it or list it” concerning our present house.  However, with either decision, our home needed some improvements (thus the new paint, new floors, and new cabinets) and we needed to clean out. 

Including my quilt studio.

I can be a minimalist in so many ways, but fabric has never been one of those areas.  When I began quilting in the early Eighties, a large stash – one which didn’t overrun your space but had a good variety – was a point of pride.  Since I already sewed my daughter’s clothes, I had scraps.  I added to this regularly.  And I found myself purchasing fabric because I needed it for a quilting class.  Then my friends went on a Shop Hop and invited me.  And there were trips to Lancaster, Pennsylvania and Paducah, Kentucky.  Add to that all the trips we’ve made between North Carolina and Florida and the local buying sprees with my quilting BFFs and I not only have a large stash, I have a large stash with memories.  Most of the time I can tell you where I purchased the fabric, what was the occasion, and who I was with. 

Fabric is my touchstone.  My scrapbook.  My time capsule.  My family album. 

However, the problem with this fabric is the same issue you have with old photographs with faces in them you don’t recognize: The memories surrounding the fabric die when I do.  Those lovely pieces of Liberty of London I’ve tucked back won’t mean a thing to whoever gets the job of cleaning out my quilt studio.  It’s far better if I can reduce it now rather than heave that burden on my kids.  So I’ve begun the process of not only downsizing my home, but also downsizing my stash. **

I’d be lying to you if I said it is easy.  But I’ve developed a system and I’d like to share some of what I’ve learned with you.  I left my bolts of fabric alone (except my Frozen fabric – the grand girls have outgrown this Disney movie, so I gave both bolts to a Disney fanatic in my guild).  I have  a half a dozen bolts left and they’re all basics – blacks, neutrals, background fabrics for applique.  I’m working my way through the yardage and purging pretty steadily.  If I can’t remember why I purchased it – for what project – it lands on the free table at my local guild.  We have several young, new-to-quilting members who appreciate it and will use it.  However, what has left me befuddled are my scraps. 

As sure as I know fabric has memory, I can also tell you applique quilters have scraps.  Lots of them.  All colors and sizes and shapes because most applique patterns don’t require a lot of yardage for the applique pieces.  I can get several good-sized leaves from a 6-inch square piece of green fabric.  Maybe even a small stem or three, too.  I gave myself a cardinal rule several years ago that any piece of fabric smaller than 8-inches square would be tossed.  You have to begin to cull somewhere at this was my starting point.   All my scraps are sorted according to color and kept in bins.  When the bin is full, I resort and purge.  However, in all honesty, the purge part of this process is kind of hit and miss, and now I find myself bewildered at my scrappage and what can I do with it besides applique. 

Maybe you’re at this point.  If you can’t bring yourself to throw out your large scraps, what can we do with them – especially if we have memories involved?  Of course, there’s always applique, but I also realize not all quilters don’t like applique although I’m still trying to figure out why.  Small quilts are always a great option and currently there are some really cute patterns available for bench pillows, door quilts, mug rugs, placemats, table toppers, etc.  Miniature quilts are another option (remember the difference between miniature quilts and small quilts is this: miniature quilts are scaled down versions of large quilts). 

If you get to the point where you find it’s difficult to throw fabric scraps away because you either associate them with good memories or you simply can’t allow yourself to toss them in the garbage, I do think it’s a good idea to set some boundaries about what you’ll keep.  With me, it’s a size (nothing smaller than 8-inches square).  For you it could be something entirely different.  If you use one particular color in most of your quilts, you may only want to save those color scraps.  If you construct a lot of Christmas quilts, you may opt to keep only holiday fabrics.  Some of the material you may not be able to let go because, well, you have some emotional ties to that fabric.  The boundaries are up to you and how scraps fit (if they fit at all) into your quilting lifestyle. 

Fabric and what it means to us – what quilt we used it in, who the quilt was for, and how we got it – will always affect the way we handle our stash.  For someone at the same life’s crossroad as I am (do we downsize and move or make some alterations and hang onto the family home?), we find out that as we simplify our life, we may have to simplify our stash.  And it’s sometimes difficult to let go of those last few pieces of pink fabric I sewed into Elli’s baby quilt or the Mickey Mouse fabric I used in Evan’s cuddle quilt because good memories are so intertwined with the fabric.  You’re constantly wondering what to keep and what to purge, and if you purge it, what do you do with it?  There are some options:

1. Give it away.  If you belong to a quilt guild, you may know some fellow members who like the same type of fabric you do.  You can always ask them if they would like a few more yards!  I recently made a few Halloween quilts – something I haven’t done before – and have several large pieces left over.  I don’t foresee any additional spooky quilts in my future, but I do have two fellow guild members who love Halloween, and those folks will get my leftovers.  The fabric will go to a good home and be used and that makes me happy.

If you don’t belong to a guild, check Facebook and Google for guilds in your area and contact them.  Sometimes they will have a use for your yardage – such as their charity quilt program.

•  Donate it to other groups.  Sometimes scout troops may need it.  Occasionally some thrift stores have a craft section and would love to have it. This takes a little research, but those groups are out there how would love to have your fabric.

•  Scrappage control.  If you want to leave your good scraps on the free table at guild, it’s a good idea to sort them by color and then put them in clear, plastic bags so they can be seen. And be generous with the sizes.  Avoid putting small scraps in the bag – those probably won’t be appreciated.  If I’m giving away scraps, I ask myself if a piece of fabric could be used for English Paper Piecing (which for some reason is still a hot commodity in the quilting world).  If the scrap can be used to cover a medium-sized hexie, it gets put in the bag.  If it doesn’t, it gets tossed. 

• What to do with scraps/fabric you can’t seem to give to anyone or any organization?  Call or email your local Goodwill store and ask if they recycle textiles.  I recently learned many Goodwill stores have an agreement with local fabric/textile recyclers who will come by the store and pick up those donations. 

I have discovered if I have a plan, it makes purging my stash just a bit easier.  However, I’ve given myself permission to hang on to some material if it is just wrapped up in too many memories.  I have inherited the stash of three quilting friends who have passed.  I can’t keep everything, but I allow myself to pick out one or two favorite pieces and hang onto them.  And if those pieces happen to be several yards, I measure off what I could comfortably use and store and keep only that amount.  This way I keep the memories, honor the quilter, but am acting responsibly with my space and resources. 

I hope this blog has accomplished two things.  First, if you’re at the same crossroads in your life that I am in mine, I want you to know you’re not alone.  We must downsize our stash, but that doesn’t mean letting go of everything that’s meaningful.  It’s okay to keep the pieces which are important and stir up warm memories.  We all want those quilts we can look at and remember special things about the fabric – why we purchased it and who we were with.  Second, when you do purge, there are viable options for the fabric to keep it out of landfills. 

Keep what speaks to you.  Let go of the rest.  And cherish the memories your fabric holds.

Until next week, from my studio to yours,

Love and Stitches,

Sherri and Felix

*If you are in the possession of old photographs and you do know who is on them (especially if they’re family photographs), be sure to write the names of the folks in order on the back of the photograph in either pencil or archival ink.  You may know these relatives and there’s a slim chance your kids may remember them.  However, chances are even slimmer your grandchildren and great-grandchildren will know who these remarkable people are.  They’re part of your family DNA which makes you uniquely you.  And as someone who has spent hours online searching for family names, burial sites, and photos, this information is priceless. 

**I do think quilters and crafters need a “back up troop.”  These are folks who your family can call on if you’re ever in a position where you can no longer quilt (or craft).  Ideally, these should be close friends who know you, your stash, your machines, what you value, and how you would want your items dispersed, sold, donated, or handled.  Keep a list of names with contact information and let your family know where this information is at.  If I’m ever no longer able to quilt, my family would honestly have no idea where to start or where to go or what to do.  But my quilting BFFs would.