Of Bridal Quilts and Dowries

When you hear the term “Bridal Quilt,” usually the quilt which comes to mind is one made specifically for the bride and groom.  It’s given as a gift, it’s somewhat of an heirloom, and really good fabrics and your best construction skills are put into play.  You don’t mind paying the long armer a little extra to customize at least part of the quilting process, or you throw all your quilting skills into the top.  It’s a once-in-a-lifetime gift, and only the super-special people in your life receive one.  Right?

That is certainly today’s definition.  However, the term “Bridal Quilt” has been used for hundreds of years and its meaning has changed over time.  As a matter of fact, to really understand what a Bridal Quilt is and its significance, you must go all the way back to Medieval Europe and another nearly-ancient term – dowry.

  During the medieval period, the practice of dowry was significant in European culture, especially with its relationship to marriage.  It was a form of payment from the bride’s family to the groom’s family, usually in the form of goods, money, or property which accompanied the bride upon her marriage.  The tradition had deep cultural and societal implications, and one of the key components of the dowery was bridal quilts. 

Now before anyone’s hackles start to rise about the bride’s family selling her off, let me strongly reiterate, this was the expected norm even before the medieval period. The concept of a dowry goes back to ancient civilizations, but it took on a rather unique form in medieval Europe.  It wasn’t so much a monetary transaction as it was a reflection of social dynamics and expectations.  It evolved over time and was influenced by historical events, religious beliefs, and society norms.  It came to be a type of “insurance” for the women.  The dowry would provide the bride with some financial security in the event of her husband’s death or worse (at least during that time) divorce.  A nice dowry would indicate the woman came into the marriage with some means of her own – she had wealth and social standing.  This was enough to pave a smooth road with the in-laws and assure the bride’s family her social standing would mean she would be well-treated. 

What was just as important – at least among the families of rank and privilege – the exchange of a dowry from the bride’s family and the promise of the groom’s family to take care of her, played a crucial role in maintaining establishing the social hierarchy.  This “wealth swap” allowed families to strengthen their social networks, forge alliances, and consolidate power.  By marrying off their daughters with a substantial dowry, families could improve their standing in the community and enhance their social reputation. 

On the face of it, it seems pretty simple.  A family has a daughter they’d like to see married into a certain family.  Talks are held.  Goods are exchanged.  There’s a wedding and hopefully somewhere in all this the couple falls in love and produces heirs.  Not too difficult and shouldn’t take too long, right?

This is a process which could take months, even years to negotiate.  The ritual involved elaborate gestures and customs.  It involved lots of discussions between the families, often mediated by intermediaries such as matchmakers or family representatives.  To complicate the whole dowry process even further, dowries could vary depending on the region and social class.  It could contain land, livestock, jewels, household items, manuscripts, and books.  It was carefully curated to reflect the bride’s family’s wealth and social status, as well as provide her with the necessary resources to establish her new household.  Dowries were often understood to be a fore-inheritance – the contents of the bride’s dowry could be handed down to her daughters as a way to make sure the bride’s wealth remained within her lineage. 

So a dowry is more than just some cash, a few goats, and a quilt or two.  It was a multi-faceted practice that went beyond a monetary transaction.  It was deeply intertwined with social, economic, and cultural dynamics, shaping the lives and futures of brides and their families.  The evolution and significance of dowries highlights the complexities of medieval society and the intricate web of relationships and power dynamics that existed within it.

But how do bridal quilts fit into medieval dowries? 

Within the framework of the dowry, bridal quilts held special significance.  These meticulously crafted quilts were meticulously handmade by the bride, her female relatives, or paid skilled artisans.  Bridal quilts were not only practical items, but also deeply symbolic and served as a testament to the bride’s skills, creativity, and dedication.

          The Symbolism of Bridal Quilts

Bridal quilts were often adorned with intricate patterns, vibrant colors, and meaningful motifs.  Each stitch and design choice carried a deeper meaning, representing the bride’s hopes, dreams, and aspirations for her future married life.  The quilt acted as a visual representation of the bride’s journey and her transformation from a single woman to married wife.  Furthermore, bridal quilts were a form of artistic expression and showcased the bride’s domestic skills.  The time and effort invested in creating these quilts demonstrated her dedication to her future household and her ability to contribute to it.  The creation of these bridal quilts was a communal effort, involving the participation of the bride, her female relatives, and often the entire community.  The process of making the quilt was a time of bonding, sharing stories, and passing down traditions from one generation to another (any of this sounding the least bit familiar?).

Various techniques and materials were used in the creation of these quilts, depending on the regional customs and available resources.  The use of intricate embroidery, applique, and patchwork allowed for the incorporation of personal symbols, family crests, or significant emblems.  The resulting quilt was not only a functional object, but also a work of art, infused with personal cultural significance. 

          Bridal Quilts Leveled the Playing Field of Medieval Dowries

It goes without saying, some women’s dowries were wealthier than others.  Depending on the socioeconomic class of the woman and her family, some dowries were laden with gold, jewels, livestock, artwork, land, and critical political ties.  Other dowries were less impressive, due to the lower socioeconomic background.  However, the one item both types of dowries had in common were the bridal quilts.  The quilts leveled everything out.  A woman with lesser means could have quilts just as lovely as a woman of great wealth.  Certainly those quilts from advantaged families were made from more extravagant materials and may have had more intricate designs than other families, but the workmanship between the two could often rival each other. 

In addition to workmanship, the cultural significance of the bridal quilts remained the same across all groups.  Bridal quilts were held in great esteem and were often heavily featured in folklore, family history, story telling and songs.  They were a way to pass down cultural traditions and preserve the collective memory of a community.  They symbolized the hopes and dreams of generations past, carrying tales of love, commitment, and resilience.  Bridal quilts acted as tangible reminders of the bonds of family and community, connecting individuals across time and generations.

          So How Do Those Medieval Bridal Quilts Affect Us Today?

To be certain, this has been a process.  While the practice of dowries remained in effect in Europe, once settlers reached North America, things changed somewhat.  To be certain, dowries remained loosely in effect with the upper class, but they soon faded from practice completely.  However, Bridal Quilts remained popular with America for years – even up until today.  A couple near and dear to your heart sets a wedding date and you begin to weigh the pros and cons of making them a special quilt – what are their colors?  What size?  Can I get the quilt done in time? 

These questions are relatively new to the American Bridal Quilt Landscape.  Somewhere around the 19^th century, wedding traditions and Bridal Quilts were upended by the new, then-petite queen of England – none other than Queen Victoria herself. 

Queen Victoria was the one who popularized the white wedding gown.  Before her bridal fashion statement, a bride’s dress could be any color.  On the American frontier, it was often the woman’s “best dress” – one which was made for her as part of her trousseau and would also serve as a church/special occasion outfit.  As a matter of fact, Laura Ingalls Wilder was married in a new, black dress made by her mother.  Dresses which were made only to be worn once were simply out of the question – at least for most families.   Life in America, even though it was nearing its 100-year anniversary, was still somewhat hardscrabble.  If the Bridal Quilt was to continue to be a tradition, it would need to be updated and it would need to be practical. 

So now, the definition changed from Bridal Quilt to Bridal Quilts.  It would be more than one.  It became tradition that a single woman would need 13 quilts before she married.  Twelve of these would be made and completed before she became engaged.  These would be the practical, everyday quilts used on family beds.  A dozen quilts allowed a woman to have enough to change out her bedding as the seasons changed or if she wanted a different look.  Twelve quilts were certainly enough to have on hand without panic as her family expanded.  These quilts were made from left over fabric in the scrap bags of her or her mother’s, aunts’, cousins, and other already-married female relatives or close friends.  They were generally nothing fancy, but pleasantly utilitarian.  These twelve quilts were quilted and finished before she became engaged and then carefully stored, waiting for the time she became betrothed and started planning her own home. 

Among these twelve, it was tradition there should be a Tree of Life

A Flower Basket

And a Pandora’s Box or Double Wedding Ring.

Why?  These quilts were exceptionally challenging, and it was believed if a woman was skilled enough to make these three quilts, she was more than capable of handling the sewing for a household.

However…that thirteenth quilt…that quilt was special.  Traditionally, this quilt was the bride’s own design and once the quilt was complete, the pattern was destroyed because “it only belonged to her.”  To keep it, to allow it to be used by another, was considered bad luck. The final, bridal quilt was usually a very intricately stitched top, an applique quilt, or a whole cloth white spread.  The quilt was made from new, costly fabric, as well as the backing and batting.  Because of the expense of the final bridal quilt, it was never started until after the engagement was announced – and it was considered bad luck to begin the Bridal Quilt before an engagement.  And while the bride’s female friends could help with the quilting, the construction of the top was strictly the bride’s job.  Another “rule” to this was tradition was the quilt should not be completed until the night before the wedding. 

Now how much truth is actually in all these traditions is up for much debate. 

Did every bride in America have 12 quilts finished and in her hope chest?  Historically, no.  Think about how long it would take to piece a dozen quilts, quilt them, and have them ready by the time you’re of marriageable age as well as attend to all the other work you had to do.  Think about what a pull from family resources a dozen quilts made for another’s household use would be.  More than likely a young woman had a half a dozen or so quilts in her hope chest.

Did every bride make a Tree of Life, Bride’s Bouquet, and a Pandora’s Box or Double Wedding Ring quilt?  Maybe.  There’s really no way to tell.  Since those quilts would fall under the utilitarian tab, most of those quilts were “used up.”  However, the fancy Bridal Quilts were never used unless there was a special occasion, such as overnight guests.  Those quilts were seldom used and a large number of them lived until the 21^st Century and are held in museums.  Overall, these are very elaborate quilts with flowers, birds, vines, and cottages.  Some include figures of a man and woman in typical wedding attire.  At least one of these museum—housed bridal quilts only has the figure of a woman and a black square where the man should be.  We can only speculate why.   A few brides’ quilts have been found with a wide black border, making it a mourning quilt. 

          What About Today’s Bridal Quilts?

Eventually, the tradition of Bridal Quilts and all the rituals which went along with those, faded into obscurity.  Times changed and tastes changed.  Quilts became less and less popular as “traditional” bedding.  Then with the bedding readily available in stores, the Bridal Quilt eventually morphed into something quilters would make for those nearest and dearest who were tying the knot.  Today there aren’t any of the traditions that go along with our quilts.  The bride may pick out the colors and fabric, but chances are she doesn’t put a stitch in the quilt.  The quilt may be full of fancy work – applique, embroidery, custom quilting – or it may be a lovely, pieced quilt with an edge-to-edge quilting design.  What hasn’t changed is the love that’s stitched into them.

I’ve made a few super-nice wedding quilts.  Each of my children have been gifted quilts (not exactly on the day they got married – I wasn’t as dedicated of a quilter then as I am now).  However, I heard something in a guild meeting a while back which made me re-think wedding/bridal quilts.  I happened to be in a Zoom quilt guild meeting with the Warwick Valley Quilt Guild and Jenny Doan of Missouri Star fame was the speaker.  We had the awesome opportunity to view her quilt studio and ask her questions.  Someone asked her about wedding quilts.  She has a fabulous idea.  She doesn’t make traditional, fancy wedding quilts any longer.  She makes picnic quilts to give to the couple. 

She pairs the quilt with a picnic basket and needed items for the picnic.  Then Jenny includes a card with the gift which says, “Always Date” and a “coupon” for a replacement quilt once the original picnic quilt is worn out. 

What a grand idea. 

Until next week, From My Studio to Yours,

Love and Stitches,

Sherri and Felix